A relationship is like a house
If a lightbulb goes out, you don’t buy a new house, you just change the lightbulb.
Unless that house is a lying whore
Then you burn the fucker to the ground and buy a better house with lights that you can fucking count on.
Oh my GOD
My grandma bought my grandpa new pants and my mom asked him how they felt and he goes “like a cheaply made castle” and we were like what and he goes “no ballroom”
I bought my friend an elephant for their room.
They said “Thank you.”
I said “Don’t mention it.”
Is there a joke here that 15 thousand people get but I don’t?